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Opps!  It look like the url you entered has changed or is invalid. No worries mate, it’s all good. Here are some really lame marketing jokes for you:

The Difference Between Optimism, Pessimism & Marketing

The Optimist says, “The glass is half full.”
The Pessimist says, “The glass is half empty.”

The Marketing Consultant says,
“Your glass needs re-sizing.”

Retail Joke

A retailer was dismayed when a competitor selling the same type of product opened next-door to him, displaying a large sign proclaiming “Best Deals.”

Not long after that, he was horrified to find yet another competitor move in next door, on the other side if his store. It’s large sign was even more disturbing—”Lowest Prices.”

After his initial panic, and concern that he would be driven out of business, he looked for a way to turn the situation to his marketing advantage. Finally, an idea came to him. Next day, he proudly unveiled a new and huge sign over his front door. It read, “Main Entrance!”

Marketing Explained

You go to a party and you see an attractive girl across the room, AND:
1. You go up to her and say: “Hi, I’m great in bed, how about it?” (That’s Direct Marketing)
2. You give your friend a buck. She goes up and says: “Hi, my friend over there is great in bed, how about it?” (That’s Advertising)
3. You somehow get her mobile number. You call and chat her up a while and then say: “Hi, I am great in bed, how about it?” (That’s Tele-Marketing)
4. You recognize her. You walk up to her, refresh her memory and get her to laugh and giggle and then suggest: “Hi, I am great in bed, how about it?” (That’s Customer Relationship Management)
5. You stand straight, you talk soft and smooth, you open the door for the ladies, you smile like a dream, you set an aura around you playing the Mr. Gentleman and then you move up to the girl and say: “Hi, I am great in bed, how about it?” (That’s Hard Selling)
6. SHE comes over and says: “Hi, I hear you’re great in bed, how about it?” (Now THAT is the power of Branding).

Trying to please everyone

An old man, a boy and a donkey were going to town. The boy rode on the donkey and the old man walked. As they went along they passed some people who remarked it was a shame the old man was walking and the boy was riding. The man and boy thought maybe the critics were right, so they changed positions.
Later, they passed some people that remarked: “What a shame, he makes that little boy walk.” They then decided they both would walk!
Soon they passed some more people who thought they were stupid to walk when they had a decent donkey to ride. So, they both rode the donkey.
Now they passed some people that shamed them by saying how awful to put such a load on a poor donkey. The boy and man said they were probably right, so they decided to carry the donkey. As they crossed the bridge, they lost their grip on the animal and he fell into the river and drowned.
The moral of the story? In Marketing, if you try to please everyone, you might as well…
Kiss your ass good-bye.